As a Chromotologist, one
who studies the movement of color and
water inside a living vessel, I focus on positive disturbances. Usually the most positive disturbance
is found in an OPPOSITE. To be more clear, we grow up watching techniques and see them as
"the way." Then we embrace another experience and find something working better and it is just the
opposite of what we formerly had valued. I just experienced another opposite which I shall call
DAREDEVIL PARENTING.
Daredevil is the name I will use to describe my delight in learning something new after mothering 7
children of my own. I flew out to see my new grandson, Sammy, and met a beautiful dark haired and
dark eyed child. He expressed himself in loud crying due to gas and all the newness of the new
out-of-the-womb life.
While my daughter was arm-rocking Sammy to comfort him, she walked over to her blender and turned it
on. Almost instantly Sammy stopped crying. He was 3 weeks old and seemed to enjoy the loud ear-splitting white noise.
Both Grandma and Grandpa stood in amazement. Then my daughter began to share how she found this trick.
One morning Sammy's daddy was routinely fixing a health smoothie and turned on the blender. Sammy,
who had been scream-crying, suddenly quieted down. He stayed quiet, closing his eyes as if falling
asleep, only to start heavily crying once daddy turned off the blender.
Naturally, daddy turned the blender back on if only to hope for a repeat performance - which he got.
Yes, Sammy loved the blender noise so much that it had become THE technique.
To master the potentially deafening noise, I started loving the sound as I knew this would direct
my energy to experience more patience. (Please read my book
ALWAYS LIKE THE FIRST TIME -
Understand Your Personal Pleasures and Rekindle The Child Within)
This noise technique was so OPPOSITE of the quiet, lullaby-tunes and gentle rocking we
had witnessed as babysitters and adopted as ignorant parents.
But that was not all. My beautiful daughter lay Sammy on his back to diaper change him. Then she
placed him on the strangest receiving blanket I had ever seen. It had a special pocket for his feet
with a Velcro tab to fasten them in. In went the feet -to stay!
Next she placed his left arm down by his side and used the left side of the blanket to tuck under that
arm. She followed the same procedure placing the right arm down by his right side and wrapping that
arm as tight as the other side. All you could see was the baby's head sticking out breathing freely.
Grandpa and I winked at each other thinking the same thing: "this is like a pastel straight-jacket."
My daughter referred to the blanket as a Swaddling Blanket. Swaddling, now where had I heard that word?
Of course in religious stories I had heard long ago in my childhood.
Grandpa and Grandma had not had a consistently loud crying baby. No colicky child out of 7 children!
I do remember wrapping the receiving blanket tightly around my babies, which stayed intact for a short
time as they fell asleep. Setting the babies down before they were deep in sleep usually brought more
crying. How I loved holding my babies even though in the 60 - 70's we were cautioned that holding them
too much or picking them up every time they cried would just SPOIL them. Oh boy!
Wait there is more! We found the noise of the blender worked very well while Sammy was in the kitchen.
But once he was ready for a bath or extra feeding he went to his gliding bassinette, which was in the
parents' bedroom. I later discovered the noise of a hair dryer took the place of the blender.
Sammy let us know that the hair dryer ranked a close second as far as effective white noise.
Seeing all these opposites I asked my daughter where she had gotten this information rom. She pulled
out a paperback book titled "The Happiest
Baby On The Block." Dr. Harvey Karp became well now for calming colicky babies by writing it. I
read through the book, amazed at how many opposite techniques he shared as he was re-creating the womb
experience.
I found a small plastic grocery bag and began to run it through my fingers, producing a medium loud
waterfall rushing noise. It worked. I held it close to his ear while he lay in my arms. I found the
arm rocking was like the movement inside the water as the mother walked and/or worked around the house
during those 9 months.
There it was the near-in-the-womb experience: swaddling to match the tight, and ever shrinking quarters
as he grew inside; a loud sh-shing-blasting of many decibels, my cheap mobile plastic bag, representing
the rushing of the blood through the mother's veins and arteries; and quick, GENTLE side to side
rocking like shaking Jello the book recommended (do get the book- there is so much more to interest you
as a young hungry- to- learn parent).
When I think of the numerous babies that have died from rough handling by young, impatient mothers and
fathers just trying to SHUT THEM UP, I realize how crucial it is to share new "tried and true"
techniques. Swaddling has been around for centuries but you have to know about this for yourself now.
So if you have something to share discovered by observation or not - write via internet, blog, website.
Add to the knowledge that brings joy and peace. Communicate with me.
Studying your human energy will bring more fascination to future parenting.
Watching the SH-SHing- (blender, CD of white noise-rustling paper); swaddling a welcomed straight-jacket,
and the gentle jerking-like jitterbugging around the kitchen floor made me see this as safe healthy
Daredevil Parenting.
Chromotologically yours,
Kathryn Pape
Copyright 2007